June 13, 2012

Onward

You know that time period in between seasons where it's not quite one season and it's not quite the other...it's just sort of stuck in transition? When you're stuck in between seasons you don't really know what to clothe yourself in because the weather is unpredictable. You go outside in shorts and a t-shirt and have to run back inside for a sweater and blue jeans. You aren't sure if you can drink the apple cider yet or if it's still lemonade time. You get the picture. And if we're speaking about weather, it's still very much summer, but if you're talking about Jessica Harwood, it's transition time. It's a bit mushy, fairly uncomfortable, and pretty awkward here in between two seasons.
I can clearly see where I came from (an exciting time of dreaming and preparing for glory through stewardship) and I can see brief snatches of where I'm going ("deeper still" in consecration and intimacy), yet I'm not sure of where I am now. I'm walking from Moab to Bethlehem, but I don't know these cities in between. I have tons of ideas, plans, and strategies, but only the Lord knows which I'm to focus on right now. I can tell something is shifting because suddenly I have long lists, but short time, which means something is about to give. I have peace and stillness in my soul, but everything around me is blurry and unset. 

Well, there's nothing I can do, but keep walking, keep listening, and keep watching. Come August, I feel I'll be setting foot into the new season before me, but until then I will be the wanderlust traveler who presses on, poised for direction. 

Speak Lord, I'm listening.

P.S. Another sign of transition? I've moved beyond that "All the Way In" song by Etiene and into the instrumental album "The Fragile World" by Avox. Heavy presence fills my room every time. Check 'em out.